


Such a Lonely Boy (Couldn't Find the Joy Within)

by myonetruelove



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Baby Fic, F/M, Fluff, alternate universe - one tree hill inspired
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-28
Updated: 2019-01-28
Packaged: 2019-10-18 08:14:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,548
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17577173
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/myonetruelove/pseuds/myonetruelove
Summary: Bellamy Blake has been keeping a secret for 6 months and it's about to come out. But he can't find it in himself to care who finds out about his beautiful baby girl.Inspired by One Tree Hill's Jake and Peyton.





	Such a Lonely Boy (Couldn't Find the Joy Within)

**Author's Note:**

> First, this is for Bellarke January Joy. Which was the most brilliant idea ever! So thanks to [Pawprinter](https://pawprinterfanfic.tumblr.com/) for organizing this. 
> 
> Second, I've recently started rewatching One Tree Hill, which was the original show that I started becoming involved in fandom with and it inspired this idea. I literally wrote it in two hours, because everything else that I've tried writing for this has not been good. I actually like the way that it turned out and am considering writing more in this universe. Just know that it's not super long because again less than two hours from start to editing. Also, I've played with the ages a lot to make this work. 
> 
> It is currently unbetaed as I didn't have time to have my beta take a look at it. I will update it when she has time to go over it, but please let me know what you think!!
> 
> The title is from "Lonely World" by Bryan Greenberg and was performed on OTH season 1.

Bellamy Blake had a secret, one that he'd managed to keep a secret for six months from everyone outside of his family. But now it was about to get out and he wasn’t sure how he felt about it.

“Is this your little sister?” Murphy leaned over the crib and watched as Selene wrapped her fist around his finger.

Bellamy sighed. He’d known that he couldn’t keep her a secret forever, but he hadn’t felt like dealing with the questions so he’d just kept it to himself. “No, this is Selene. She’s my daughter.”

Murphy’s head whipped around, the shock written all over his face. “You have a daughter?” He looked back to Selene. “That no one knows about?”

Bellamy shrugged. “Yeah, it’s not something I felt like anyone needed to know.” 

Murphy nodded. “She’s cute.”

And that was it - the end of his secret, but if Bellamy was honest, he felt relieved. He didn’t have to hide his beautiful baby girl any longer. His mom and his sister didn’t have to keep this secret for him. He wasn’t sure if it would help any with how much they all struggled, but at least it was out there.

It was a few days later that she was introduced to the rest of his friends. Jasper’s mom had hired him to work at her cafe, but after having to bail on his first shift part of the way through, Bellamy had been sure that he’d lost the job. Karen had called him later in the day to make sure that everything was okay and to be sure that he would still be in for his shift the next day.

Karen smiled when Bellamy walked into the door, Selene in her carrier and Octavia trailing behind him. Bellamy fought to smile, but he just couldn’t bring himself to do it. “Karen, I’m so sorry. My mom got called into work early. I couldn’t leave them at home.” 

Karen took Selene’s carrier from him, nodding to Octavia. “Why don’t you guys come with me?” She led them to the back corner where a crib was set up next to a corner booth. “Need I remind you that I was a single mother when I started this cafe?” She set Selene’s carrier down before pulling her out and setting her inside the crib. “This was where I kept Jasper when I was working. Now, this is where you can keep Selene. Octavia, you’re welcome to this booth whenever you need to hang out while Bellamy is working.”

At eleven, Octavia loved the idea of being left to her own devices. She grinned at Karen before sliding into the booth and pulling out her homework. “Thanks, Karen. You don’t have to worry about me, Bell. I’ll get my homework done and keep an eye on Selene.”

Bellamy felt the tears welling up in his eyes. They could really use the money from this job. His mom worked so hard to support both him and Octavia and when Selene had come along, she hadn’t even batted an eyelash. Aurora Blake had looked at him and told him how proud she was that he was stepping up to be a father, unlike both his and Octavia’s fathers. She didn’t care that she had to work harder and she’d refused to let him quit basketball since it was his best chance at a scholarship. Maybe letting people know about Selene _was_ a good thing.

“Oh, who is this precious one?” Clarke’s voice was slightly higher pitched as she stepped up the crib, a smile on her face. “Aren’t you a pretty girl?”

Bellamy cleared his throat. He’d had a thing for Clarke for years. She’d always been nice to him even when her other rich friends had made fun of him. Once they’d hit high school she ran with a much different crowd than him, but she’d never lost that kindness. She was beautiful inside and out and now she was actually his friend. Ever since she’d dumped Finn, the cheater who had tried to come between her and her best friend, she had drifted away from the assholes she’d once called friends. In fact, she’d been accepted into the delinquents without much hassle.

“That’s Selene, she’s my daughter.”

He watched as the questions slid over her face, but then she just smiled. “Cool.” She turned to see Octavia in the booth. “And you must be the famous Octavia.”

Octavia scoffed. “Famous? I doubt that.”

“Oh, but you don’t understand. Your brother has been telling stories about you since you were born.” Clarke grinned as she glanced back at Bellamy for just a moment. “Do you mind if I sit with you? I have some sketching to do and this is the best place to people watch.”

When Octavia just shrugged, Clarke slid into the booth opposite his sister, pulling out her sketch pad and all he could do was stare. “Don’t you have some work to do?” Clarke’s eyebrow was raised as she addressed him, but her eyes never left the drawing that she was working on.

“Uh, yeah. Let me know if you or Selene need anything, O.”

“I’ve got this, Bell. Go work.” Octavia didn’t even look up from her homework.

It continued on like this for months, one of his friends sitting with Octavia and Selene while he waited tables. Mostly it was Miller, Murphy, or Clarke - which had been such a major shock to him. He and Miller had been best friends for years so he’d been a little hurt that Bellamy had kept Selene from him, but he’d understood. Murphy acted as if he cared about no one, but Selene had him wrapped around her little finger. And Clarke - he didn’t even know why she cared so much, but she was _always_ there. He’d tried for years to get over his crush, but he hadn’t been able to shake it. Now, it was even worse, because she was always there. 

Even now at ten at night, she was sitting in the booth with a sleeping Octavia across from her and a sleeping Selene in her arms as he closed up. And he just couldn’t keep it in anymore so as soon as he was done he’d picked Octavia up, allowing Clarke to carry Selene out to his car. Once they were settled into the car, he turned to her. “Why?”

Clarke laughed as her nose wrinkled up in the most adorable way. “Why what, Bellamy?”

“Why are you always helping me out?”

The smile fell off her face slowly, a look of confusion taking its place. “That’s an odd question. We’re friends. Why wouldn’t I help you out?”

“I get that, but you help out more than most friends would so I want to know why.” Bellamy shoved his hands in his pockets. “I just don’t understand and I don’t do well with things that I don’t understand.”

Clarke glanced at the two sleeping girls in the car before turning back to him. “Think we can go for a drive?” She held up her hand when he opened his mouth. “Just to the River Court so we can talk. I’d rather not do it outside of Karen’s.”

Bellamy just nodded, opening the passenger’s side door for her. Because Arkadia was so small, the River Court was only a 10-minute drive. Once there Bellamy rolled the windows down a little to let the breeze into the SUV while he and Clarke climbed out. He followed her to the small set of bleachers before settling down next to her. 

Clarke looked down at her hands for a moment before glancing up to look at him. “If I answer your question, will you tell me about Selene and her mother?”

Bellamy tensed up. He hated telling that story and he’d only told it once before and that had been to his own mother, but he nodded. It was the least that he could do with how much she had been helping him out.

“My dad died three years ago.” Clarke’s voice was quiet as she spoke. “He ran a red light on the way to pick me up from cheerleading practice. The other car didn’t see him and he was killed on impact.” Tears trickled down her cheeks and she glanced up at him as he took her hand. “My mom never said it aloud, but she blames me. She started working with Doctors Without Borders my freshman year. She’s gone for 11 months out of the year so that she doesn’t have to see me and that’s fine. We’ve never had the best relationship, but it’s lonely. I’ve never enjoyed being in that big house all by myself. That’s why I dated Finn for so long, there were always people following him around. I didn’t feel quite as alone, but when we broke up I was back to being on my own most of the time. Helping you with Selene and Octavia makes me feel less lonely.”

 

Bellamy wiped the tears the remaining tears from her face and gave her a sad smile. He understood feeling lonely. “I remember when your dad died. Everyone loved him so much. You know he coached our little league team right?” 

After watching Clarke nod, he continued. “We weren’t friends then, but I wish I would’ve reached out to you. I’m sorry that you had to go through that, Clarke. Especially with your mom gone all of the time.” He sighed, looking up again when she squeezed his hand. Now it was his turn. He braced himself because even now, thinking of Echo broke him a little inside. “Things with me and Selene’s mom were never good. Echo was a senior last year. We met at a party. I never went to many of them, but when I made the varsity team last year the guys were always trying to get me to go with them. Mom was off on a Friday, something that never happens, so she told me to go out and have some fun - act like a teenager. So I did.”

“She was beautiful and older - I wasn’t even 16 yet. She wanted to have sex, so we did. I liked her - usually. She could be a bitch, but when she loved you, you were her whole focus. We fought all the time, but sometimes I think she started the fights just so we could make up. It was not a healthy relationship, I know that now.” He paused for a moment, taking a deep breath. “We’d been dating for less than six months when she told me she was pregnant and not just a little pregnant either. She’d been ignoring the signs. She was already five months pregnant by the time she told me. I don’t know how I didn’t realize it at the time - the signs were all there. We were both a mess. The idea of having a child so young is scary in the best of circumstances. She was graduating in a few months and she didn’t want a kid, but I convinced her that we should have it. Her parents had her drop out of Arkadia and she did an online school that let her graduate early. The day she and Selene were released from the hospital, she brought Selene to my door and told me that she wasn’t meant to be a mother. She was going on a road trip with some friends for the summer and she’d be in New York for college in the fall. She didn’t want anything to do with Selene or with me. She told me that she blamed me for trying to ruin her life. She said that Selene would hold her back from becoming the person that she wanted to be.”

“That’s terrible, Bellamy.” Clarke’s hands were warm in his as she ran her fingers lightly over his.

“It is what it is.” Bellamy shrugged. “Selene is the best thing that ever happened to me. But I don’t look forward to the day that I have to tell her about her mom. I just don’t want her to feel like she’s missing out on something because Echo abandoned her.”

“With as much love as you give that little girl, she’ll never be missing out.” Clarke’s hand came up to stroke his cheek. “You love her more than anything. We can all see it and she’ll be able to see it. I promise you that.”

Bellamy looked into her eyes and deep inside he knew that this was his one chance. If he wanted a chance with Clarke Griffin, this was it. He glanced at her lips for just a moment and when his eyes met hers again, he knew this was it. He leaned over, lips brushing against hers for just a beat. When he tried to pull back, Clarke’s arms wrapped around his neck and pulled him back to her.

When her tongue ran across his lower lip he opened to her with a small sigh, his arms wrapping around her and pulling her into his lap. Kissing Clarke was better than he could have ever imagined - he could almost swear he saw fireworks. When they pulled apart they were both breathing hard. He rested his forehead against hers as he smiled. “Well, that was definitely not how I saw this conversation ending.”

Clarke laughed, throwing her head back as she did so. “Then you haven’t been paying attention at all, Bellamy.” She gave him a small smile. “I’ve been trying to get you to ask me out for months. Even before I found out about Selene.”

“You do realize that I’m a 16-year-old junior who is a single father that has to work AND help take care of my baby sister, right? It’s not like I’m some great catch.”

“I never want to hear you say anything like that ever again, Bellamy Blake. You care more about your friends and family than you do yourself. You work hard so that your mom doesn’t have to kill herself taking care of all of you. You are a better man than most grown ass adult males are. You are the catch of the century and you’re all mine.” Clarke’s grin was huge as she leaned down to kiss him again.

“Yes, I’m all yours.” He gave her another kiss before pulling away. “Unfortunately I need to get those girls home and into bed. I can give you a ride home.”

Clarke shook her head. “Why don’t I give you a hand getting them to bed and then we can hang out for a little while before I go home?”

And how was Bellamy supposed to say no to that? He knew that they had a hard road ahead of them because there was no way that they couldn’t. He had a daughter that less than a year old and a sister that depended on him. But if he was going to bet on anyone, it would be Clarke Griffin and there was no way that he was going to pass up the chance to be with her. He knew that she could make him happy and he would try his hardest to make sure that he made her happy too.


End file.
